Conversations With Bigfoot

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Oregon Sasquatch Symposium

June 19-20, 2010

The 1st Annual Oregon Sasquatch Symposium coming up in Eugene, Oregon June 19-20!



Conversations With Bigfoot - Page 4

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Leaving No Trace...

IVES:You say you conceive only in the Spring. How do you control conception? Are the females only fertile in the Spring?
BF:We pay attention to balances. Fertility partakes of balance.
IVES:You use that word often. It must have special significance for you.
BF:It is our knowledge, just as the play between the real and imaginary has become yours.
IVES:I must ask you this-how do you know English?
BF:Nescomale was my teacher.
IVES:But how did he learn it?
BF:From his teacher, Fuscus. That's as far as I know, though I think your language has been with us always. And it is very pretty in its own way, though not like the fox's, so roughly eloquent, or like the wild pigs, earnest and preoccupied. 11
IVES:How can...
BF:Excuse me, but may I ask you a question?
IVES:Certainly. Anything.
BF:Do you have any cashew nuts? 12
IVES?Cashew nuts?, I dont.
BF:No matter. The last one of your people I talked with gave me some. I liked them very much. Some would be good now.
IVES:You confound me. I mean, how can you ask me that. You must have twenty broken bones-doesnt it hurt?
BF:The pain is very bad.
IVES:But you don't show it.
BF:I will, later. It is not necessary now.
IVES:You mean you can control it?
BF:I can manipulate the necessity of its time, but not its inevitability. To do so would torture balance.
IVES:Is balance like a religion with you?
BF:No. While we do have many ceremonies celebrating our being, and respect all that lies beyond our knowledge, we have no necessity for religion. I assure you, we know no more of "God" or gods than you. It is one of our powers. (long pause) You see, because our knowledge is involved with balance we live very near the center of things. Your knowledge being the way it is-the precision of extremes-you live on the edge. For us it takes little energy to maintain our existence; for you, the amount is huge. It would deform our being to join you, it would leave the center unmediated-such a journey! Understand, please, you are exhausting us. We cannot mediate you much longer. You must return to the point of balance.
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11 I felt a playful mockery here.

12 I still find his asking for cashew nuts astonishing. Perhaps he wished to demonstrate that he had previous contact with humans or that he needed salt.


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